I’ve gotten down a really bad rabbit down. At first, I started trying to look for ways to get into really good colleges which turned into trying to find cool science fairs I’m interested in, but also turned into me just seeing people having accomplished much more than me by the time of my age. I have a strong passion for the sciences and my ambition helps motivate me, but it’s also my downfall when I compare myself to people “better” than me. It lowers my self-esteem and diverts my focus away from my passions and into the anxiety of FOMO. In fact, I never even liked being the best of the best—my motivation came in a sense of accomplishment, but my accomplishments just seem negated compared to these other people. It just sounds like the world is telling me that I’m nothing special or will never reach anything that I could feel proud of for my life no matter what I do. I feel worthless in the grand scheme of things. I’m still so young as a high schooler, so I don’t even feel like I need to be thinking of these things, but I do. I’m always comparing myself to people better than me and can’t stop.
