Throwaway bc I’m embarrassed.
I’ve been out of high school for over a full year now. Coming up in august it’ll be 2 years since i started my senior year.
For most of my school experience, I was in a small private school, up until my 8th grade year, when we switched to home schooling. We only did that for one year, as it wasn’t really for us.
The year that followed, my freshman year, I was sent to public school. I didn’t really feel like i fit in there, and wasn’t sure what to do. Then, Covid happened. We were all stuck at home, which wasn’t too hard for me to handle. I spent my Sophomore year at home as well.
My Junior year was different. I decided to enroll in a career-based school that puts you in classes depending on the job you wanted to do later in life. I decided to go into the graphic design path. There, I finally found my people. Everyone was friends, everyone was so nice. I have never felt so included and comfortable in my entire life. I met some amazing people, and made some amazing friends. That year is the absolute highlight for me. I even met a wonderful girl.
That girl and I started dating towards the end of the year, and that summer was spent hanging out with her and friends nearly daily. It was so perfect. I miss it so much.
Later on that summer, things sort of fell apart a little. The girl and I broke up. That destroyed me. One of my best friends moved to Florida. That destroyed me too. I have never really fully recovered from that breakup I don’t think. I still think about her all the time, even though it’s been nearly 2 years.
Senior year wasn’t as fun. I spent most of my time longing for her, hoping for a second chance. It almost happened too.. but it fell right through my fingers.
Now, I’m almost 20, and I absolutely do not know how to get over this. I’m miserable.