I love reading, but I always end up getting overly attached to the characters, especially those who have troubled childhoods. I feel personally attacked if someone says something negative about them or if I stumble upon fanfiction where they are being criticized or if my favorite couple breaks up, especially if it involves cheating. It sometimes triggers my anxiety, and I don’t understand why this particular scenario is one of my triggers, unlike others that I can comprehend. For example, I get triggered if someone screams at me, by loud noises, or if I remember something from the past. But why is this? I don’t understand. Should I stop reading or find a new hobby? But then I get bored and lose interest so easily. I know people have the right to dislike whatever or whoever they want, and I shouldn’t take it personally. It’s none of my business, which is why I never leave hate comments. I also don’t understand why cheating is a trigger for me, since I’ve never been in a relationship to begin with. However, I did experience betrayal when one of my closest friends told multiple people about the SA incident. That’s how my mother found out; I didn’t tell her because I was afraid she would blame me. I blamed myself for years before I went to therapy. I’m getting of the topic, I think I should stop before I dig deeper. Help me please 🥺
Also, I have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, still have panic attacks once or twice a month, a mild case of OCD, and had severe depression (which is now manageable).