There are times that i cant seem to get my head to stop thinking. It feels like there's a devil's advocate in my head that is trying to analyze and rationalize everything, and i just cant seem to control it. Its almost like I'll be subconsiously disconnected from the present and go into a trance-like state, where the thoughts just keep on going at 100mph and just doesn't stop. In rare occasions it feels like I'm gonna crazy from all the thinking. Its literally like someone drunken rambling in my head, I wouldnt even remember almost any of what I was thinking of when i snap back into the present. Sometimes it gets quite out of control and my head physically start to tense up.
And at times, it becomes a barrier to my emotions. For example, i would be feeling sad and crying about something. And my brain would be simultaneously analyzing why I am feeling this way WHILE I am feeling those emotions. It's like I can't simply let myself be sad. Then it's almost like a voice in my head goes: "What if i think about other things that makes me stop feeling sad". And subconsciously I would start to think about things not even related to what I was feeling sad about, eg my friend's text that I haven't replied to, and i go into that so-called "trance" and suddenly i just feel nothing. (sorry for the rant)
Its especially times when I feel sad that this problem becomes annoying. It makes me feel out of touch and disconnected with my emotions, because of how seemingly easy it is for me to push my emotions aside.
For more context, this pattern usually occurs when I'm at home and by myself. I dont even know how it came to be like this, although I might have a hunch. And i feel so frustrated with myself. Help guys.