parents divorced at 8, it was nasty. i lived with my mom, she fed me lies about my father that made me hate him for years. she would go back and fourth from “you should have a relationship with your dad” to blocking his number on my phone. She mentally and emotionally abused me most of my life. called me names, did not resolve conflict with me, never ever apologized for her actions and how she treated me. i’m 24 now and cut her out of my life after her DUI last year. dealing with a lot of pent up feelings that i don’t know how to work through. i’ve had a very hard time learning to communicate and resolve fights as an adult because of this. i feel pretty lost most of the time and like i don’t matter. she has gotten my siblings to turn on me, at least i have a great relationship with my dad now. it really hurts not having a mom, and i feel like people don’t talk about this enough. i’m getting married this year, and she’s not included in anything because it would ruin my entire wedding experience. but it hurts and i think about it daily. i cannot invite her just for the sake of having her there because she is my ‘mom’. i have saved videos from when i was a teenager of her threatening me and bullying me. she does not have a drinking problem or drug problem (that i know of) and looks normal from the outside. if you met her, you would never suspect a thing. i need help healing from this. and i don’t know where to start or how to work on releasing this trauma that is affection my life and my relationship with my fiance. please help if you have a similar situation.
