Hi I am a male, 20 years old. I’m going to remain anonymous but I am really confused with my life right now. I feel like the odd one out, I used to have so many friends I was always the popular kid in school, always had people come to my birthday party’s, had so many friends. I went out daily playing football, going on days out, I just was living. I slowly isolated myself away from everyone, my foster family, my friends, every single person in my life. The only person I have contacted in the past 1 year and half is my ex girlfriend and social worker. For the past 2-3 years I would say, I have been hearing voices that sound external, I haven’t been outside by myself for the past 2-3 years also, only with my social worker. I am now on 300mg x2 a day quetiapine with no actual diagnoses… I need thinking people are out to get me. The voices have commanded me to do many bad things which got me sent to court for going out with a knife to hurt someone…. Got a year probation and that’s it. Finished probation now on bail because people came to my house saying they will kill me ( have court this month 25th). Every single time I’m near a human I feel so out of touch I feel as if I’m not like everyone else, I feel as if I’m just living in a delusional state of mind and everything I am seeing is just a fixation of illusion. When I go outside everything feels like it’s closing in on me. I hear non stop laughing, nasty comments, feel as if people are staring at me. What I really want from this post is just an opinion as I’m very confused as what is wrong with me as i have no diagnoses but am on 300mg of quetiapine x2 a day… my sister had bpd… could it be that?
