i’ve always been very emotional since i gained consciousness and my parents always thought even though i would get sad everytime something bad/sad happened i always showed them “signs” of getting over things pretty quickly.
the problem is that they were away too harsh whenever i actually balled my eyes out, complained about bullying and other bad stuff that happened with friends…my mental health in general, i have been always told since elementary school to get over things and to “mind the bad stuff” but this only accumulated during the years i spent all my time trying to heal myself but it didn’t work and now i feel like i wasted sm time hating everything and everyone, “trying to do my best” when i knew was miserable.
during middle school and high school i had some moments where im sure i disassociated and felt completely disconnected from reality, some family members got sick and died, my own mother got hospitalized two times for 6 months in 2015 and another in 2017 which made her chronically ill and school just didn’t get any better, i only became conscious about this when my friends and family made me aware of what happened bc i didn’t remember most of what happened, sometimes i still struggle remembering ://
my parents always say they are here for me but they can’t grasp the fact that all this trauma still affects me, that i still feel away much younger mentally than i am bc trauma is a bitch and ruined my middleschool and highschool years, like i said i spent my time being afraid to tell any adults or professionals what was going on with me, ik that 18 is super young but it’s heartbreaking to me to be still mourning all the time i lost.
i’m sorry my english is not the best, still i don’t want this to be just a sob story i really need some opinions to see if anyone has had similar experiences or has any advice, i would be very thankful to receive and read them🙏