i had a lecture today that was three hours long but felt like an eternity. i’m always trying to be self-aware at least a little bit and especially when i’m feeling negative. by the middle of class, the thoughts in my head reflected that i had basically given up on life. my common illogically negative thoughts include: this feeling is going to last forever, my life is always miserable, i’ll never be happy again, this is doing irreparable damage to my fragile mental health, i’m failing everything, everyone hates me and so on.
when i’m having these clusters of negative thoughts, it’s helpful for me to take a step back and put them to the test. am i actually failing my course on the first day or is it that i’m like every other student in this room and simply unable to absorb a 160 slide power point that is incredibly boring and delivered in a rush with no breaks that just goes on and on for an hour and a half? ya, pretty sure it’s the 160 slides in a row with no interaction. is this actually doing me mental damage and draining what little energy i have for the day? no, i’m just feeling like shit because i’m bored and overwhelmed. when this lecture is over, it’ll take me maybe ten or fifteen minutes to be good as new. based on past experiences, should i really be stressing that i can’t retain like the majority of this lecture? no, most of this is irrelevant.
should i come prepared for this class to possibly turn the lecture into more of a conversation by having something to talk about and relate to the course content so i won’t be so detached and miserable and maybe get something out of it? YES.