I’m using fake names as an example:
Shelly is autistic. She is not feeling well and does not feel like talking to anyone. Her also autistic girlfriend, Alice, texts her.
Alice: Shelly, I really need someone to talk to right now! It’s important! Text me when you’re ready, love!
Shelly: *does not respond*
Alic: Hey it’s been a few days. Is everything okay love?
Alice: hey are you still coming to the play?
Shelly: *keeps ignoring her and doesn’t come to the play*
Alice: it’s been an entire month, I saw your recent Facebook post and you have been hanging out with your friends. I thought you were having a burnout. I’m so glad you’re okay baby!
Shelly: *does not answer*
Alice: gets in contact with Shelly’s parent. Hey, I noticed Shelly is acting different. When I see her in real life she gets mad at me, calls me dumb, then goes and talks to this girl. She also doesn’t respond to any of my texts or calls and I feel like she doesn’t care anymore.
Shelly’s parent: Shelly is learning to unmask. She’s exhausted from school. She’s going to act smart, ignore, and abuse you. That’s just how unmasking works. Trust me, I’ve been there
Alice: oh. Okay. I understand.
It’s been months, and being ignored has took a toll on Alice’s mental health (she has no friends). She decides to break up with Shelly for hurting her feelings. Shelly finally answers, and does not care that Alice is leaving her. Alice feels TERRIBLE about herself and is really depressed. The next day, Shelly makes it official with one of her friends that they are dating.
This basically happened to me with my girl friend but everyone blamed it on her self dx ASD. I don’t know if I’m an AH or not bc I’m autistic too.
I posted a much more detailed version of what happened with me and her but people were getting mad at me so here is the summarized version of what happened in a texting/phone call conversation.