There’s a few TWs in this, the main is ED there will also be a mention of SH and SA
On Monday (this week) my (23 F) sister (17 f) came over to my moms house after I got in a fight with my dad over FaceTime.
Long story short my dad’s an asshole and is refusing to pay for my college after a bad semester (I was raped), despite having a 3.455 GPA.
Anyways my sister came over Monday night after missing my birthday dinner on Sunday. Which is fine, my family is really messed up. She got to the house right after I had gone in my room to decompress from the conversation I had with my dad over the phone. I’m already about to start crying and am just trying to ignore how I feel so I can go interact with her and my mom.
When she comes in she talks to my mom for a little bit and then comes in my room. I don’t remember how the conversation started but we start talking about how my dad really doesn’t like me and blah blah blah. Please do not say because he’s my dad he loves me. I’m sick of hearing that shit. As we’re talking she goes to tell me that she hasn’t eaten anything since Friday! She also tells me that her ex bf (they still hang out) doesn’t treat her well and forces her into having sex with him.
Growing up, I had a really hard time just living. It was hard. Everything was exhausting and the physical and emotional abuse from my dad didn’t help. I was hospitalized many times for self harm and was diagnosed with anorexia at one point. My sophomore year I was sent to a therapeutic boarding school in Utah, here they didn’t really help just taught me how to be a somewhat functioning robot of society. Once I got out, and went back to public school I worked really hard to graduate on time. I managed it but it was hard. I started college and didn’t really know what I wanted to do. I took a few classes and finally realized that I want to be a wildlife biologist. I went to the local community college, and in the fall semester of my 2nd year I was raped by a customer at the job I worked at. Anyways I had a bad semester and then took a year off.
Sorry getting off topic. Having grown up with really bad mental health and the abuse (which my sisters had no idea about) i put my family through a lot. I know my parents issues are my parents issues, but I can’t help to think that I was PART, not the whole reason, that they divorced. It’s better that they are but it’s still hard because my sisters were happier when they were together even though they (my parents) weren’t.
Understandably mental health issues runs on my dads side of the family, his dad was bipolar and my dads grandmother was schizophrenic (at least we think, schizophrenia wasn’t really a thing when she was alive). My sister having dealt with food issues since she was in 5th grade and I was the only one who really noticed but never said anything, kinda was just pushed under the rug. My parents don’t know how to tell if anything is going on with any of their kids and tend to ignore physical and mental health issues.
I want to help my sister but I don’t know how. I told her to make a pros and cons list about being friends with her ex bf, and she only had cons. I’ve never had to deal with someone (other than myself) who has mental health issues, that I care about so much. I really need advice.
TLDR: my sister is having the same mental health issues as me and I want to help but don’t know how.