I am having a hard time to really not care about what other people think of me – or what I believe other people think about me. To be clear, I am not speaking about situations or aspects where it would be 'normal' to care what other people think (in the sense that almost every human being would care).
Instead, I am speaking about situations where another person's opinion 'shouldn't' matter. E.g. if I have a hobby, I am afraid other people think I suck at it. Due to this, I am afraid to e.g. play an instrument in front of other people, because I am afraid they will judge me. If I imagine this judgement, I also ruminate about it and feel anxious / like a loser.
Another example: I don't get along with my coworkers so well and really don't like them (among others because they make racist and homophobic remarks, but also because we don't match in terms of age and lifestyle). Due to this, I keep to myself at work. Especially the nasty remarks make it feel 'unsafe' to self-disclose around them, as I have a history of being bullied. Still, despite the fact that I don't like them and also see them as pathetic, I still worry about their opinion a lot – e.g. that they think I am an awkward loser without social skills.
I think in both cases, I shouldn't worry about other people's opinion and I tell myself to stop doing this, but it doesn't really work. Does anybody have any tips?