I don’t know how to deal with my feelings.

I hope whoever reads this is doing well

I (19M) have been struggling a lot over the past 4 years, for various reasons. Over time, I fell into a really deep depression, with no help. I often find myself filled with anger, usually when something goes wrong, or something doesn’t go the way I wanted it to. As of very recently I’ve resorted to punching a wall, or myself, which is something I really don’t want to turn into a habit. I also scream into a pillow occasionally. A therapist I saw a while ago said it could help release anger, it doesn’t, it just distracts me. Therapy as a whole hasn’t helped me at all, I don’t know if it was me or the therapists I went to. I kind of feel hopeless right now, I’m filled with all these emotions and don’t know what to do, and I have no one I trust enough to share this with. I’ve tried breathing exercises, screaming into a pillow, 1-2 types of meditation, and it doesn’t help. Does anyone have any advice on what I can do to try and fix this? Thank you

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