Approaching 30 in a few years but I do not have my life together. I’ve never had a full time job and barely any gigs. For over a year, I’ve been rotting in my room. I want to get a job, I really do but I don’t know what the hell I want to do. It’s been this way since I was still in school. I was never good at school, I barely got by. I took a longer path to university but quit within a month.
I once had almost everything going good but I threw it all away because deep down I was never truly happy with myself. Probably due to my messed up childhood but I don’t know. I have seek therapy but it never uncovered what is wrong with me. I feel like I have many undiagnosed mental disorders but I’m too broke to afford any diagnosis.
I have been so overwhelmed in my head. All I have are thoughts and internal monologue but never any action. I can’t put myself into getting a job. I just think about what it’s like doing the job but I get overwhelm by it and never ever apply.
I want to live a normal decent life with a simple job but I can’t even do that. I’m just wasting my time away.