I don’t really have anything else to say.
I can’t find the words to really explain it and I don’t want to. I’m so tired of myself. I don’t understand I feel like this when I haven’t been hurt by life like some other people.
All I know is that I feel miserable and that leads to chills, a loud heartbeat and this urge for everyone around me to pay attention. I’ll literally screaming in my head for people to look at me and ask me if everything is okay… just to deflect their concern. I don’t believe that they care and maybe that’s my fault. I probably spent too much time in high school being a faux therapist to my friends that I neglected my ill feelings. It’s funny. I think. I don’t even know if I want people to actually read this and respond to this. Please ignore this post, it’ll save you time. I want to puke and also rip out my heart. My face is very tingly and numb. I want to cry. I can’t cry. It hurts to cry.
