I wake up every day wishing I never did. I put on a fake smile and fake personality so much so that I’m not even sure what’s fake about me and what’s not. I hate myself because I’m not ever good enough for anyone, including myself. I put so much energy into trying to be likeable and yet it feels like no one sees me. I feel so incredibly alone and worthless. I’ve become nonchalant about everything because I’ve grown to be so emotionally numb, I feel that if I ever feel emotion again it will be too overwhelming. I want more than anything to have someone I love with my heart and soul say they feel the same about me, I’ve put everything I have into trying to be told that I mean something to someone and no one has ever told me it and it hurts. I don’t want to take my own life, that’s out of the question, but I feel like I don’t want to live anymore.
