I’m growing very very tired. My entire life (I’m mid 30s) I’ve struggled with depression, anxiety, endometriosis, addiction, bipolar diagnosis , general life issues (lost a lot of jobs due to these factors recently , huge financial struggles , residing with toxic family because I can’t be anywhere else )
I feel like when I try to get a grasp on one thing and think it’s going to help, everything else comes to the surface ( no anxiety? Pain will be bad. Ex. ) I lose hope, everything piles up , I get myself help , things get better for a bit and then fall apart )
I haven’t worked in almost 8 months. Job market is awful. Found something part time to get out of the house , my pain flared up immediately the next day, I was so anxious all shift I could barely look anyone in the eyes.
I have a shift today and I’m absolutely dreading it. I wake up sweat covered and right away my brain is in high alert like okay what are we doing today? My hearts racing.
I was going to delete this but … thanks for reading.