Hey guys im a 27 year old male. I moved to canada when i was 6 years old with my family and moved back to my home country macedonia(eastern europe balkans). The change was drastic but i went to a highschool and drank and smoked weed. I had a huge mental breakdown. I went to college and all my life ive been popular. Something. I had a fun life of adventures. But ive always had irrational fears( like when i was in canada i say a gay couple and fot traumatized. I spend the whole summer questioning if im gay.) Im also extremely sensitive. I have an evil side of me wherw i like people fallling apart. And then i think it was covid it hit me. Ive been living a lie. I thought thaat i was a king. I couldnt livewith myself anymore so i decided to drink
It got really bad, 4 years binge drinking. Im 2 months sober and my life is fucked. No gf, no job. No skills. I have a huge huge home and lovely parents but i cant find my way. Im a christian but i just feel dead inside. I dont have an identity. I made so many bad decisions in my life and i have a very fragile ego. I wanna get into something like a field of work but i dont know what. I do have a degree in marketing management. Im too weak and lost atm. Please any advice . Ps i have ptsd
