I have severe anxiety about my birthday. I fucking dread It. I have horrible memories and Ive never had one birthday where nothing went wrong.
This year might be the worst. i turned 19, and 6 months ago my mom got really controlling over my life. Im not allowed to have friends or date or talk to people online, and I haven’t spoken to anyone outside my brother and mom in 6 months Due to having nowhere in real life.
I have a boyfriend, but I have to date him in secret and I don’t get to text him often.
im morbidly depressed, napping and just trying to get through the day. Whenever my mom thinks I’m sad she gets really really upset so I also have to mask and pretend Im having a good day which stresses me out more.
i don’t even have my brother today because my dad (who I cut off) kept him for an extra day (divorced parents) out of spite.
i dont know. I’m depressed. Borderline sui but I’m not gonna do it. I’m tired and lonely.
(extra note I know birthdays don’t matter but it just sucks and I’m sad and thats Why I’m here)