I’ve been single all my life and for the past 6 years after telling a girl that I really liked how I felt and her not reciprocating, I’ve been hoping that I’d finally find someone new but every time I see a woman that I’m attracted to, they’re either in a relationship or they’re not attracted to men and now that I’m older I have friends that are married and it’s just been something that’s been on my mind for a long time. It’s something that won’t leave my mind now matter how hard I try.
For context, I do go out. I have multiple friend groups and organizations that I’m a part of. I’m not a shut-in or an incel who victim blames the world for not being able to find a woman. In fact, everything else in my life is great. I have a great relationship with my family, I’m getting closer to earning my degree, I love my job, and like I said earlier I’m involved with a lot of social stuff. I just know that my inability to attract women is my fault and that there’s something wrong with me but I don’t know what it is. I keep thinking it’s either my appearance or my personality, but my friends keep telling me that it’s not that, so what is it? How have I never been able to attract anyone?
I’ve literally never kissed a girl, been in a relationship, been on a date, or even held hands with a girl. It’s quite embarrassing for someone my age, and constantly being faced with my friends who are in relationships is a huge burden on my mind as it’s essentially a parasite in my mind that won’t go away. I’m very happy for my friends as they deserve happiness and I’m not jealous, just angry at myself for my own shortcomings. And it’s also not like I don’t try either. I’ve asked a few girls that I’m close with on dates and they’ve all kindly rejected me. Because of my shortcomings, I’ve become very lonely and my mental health hasn’t been the best because of it. I’m just tired of waiting for something and taking action for something that might not even happen.
So lately I’ve been wondering, am I destined to be single for all my life? Is this my path and I just haven’t accepted it yet? If I am truly supposed to be single, then how do I accept it? How do I remove my desire for a relationship and accept the fact that I’m most likely going to be single for all my life?