TW: Death
I have a mug that my mom gave me, if I think about donating it etc I think things like "Well when she dies you'll probably miss all the shit you threw out that she gave you"
Or there will be a family dinner that I don't want to attend because I had a long day, but then my brain will be like "Well they will be dead in the next 20 years and you'll regret not going to this dinner"
I have thought this way since I was little. I would feel bad about going to friend's houses because I was leaving my parents all alone. I'm turning 30 this year. It feels so childish.
This has greatly intensified since my dad passed in December. I literally can't say no to anything anymore because eventually they will be dead and gone so I might as well do it. But this is really draining to my mental state, which is already fragile lol.