People keep telling me that it’s going to get better when?
I have lived my life I wouldn’t change a thing about it
I have loving boyfriend and friends
I’ve read
I’ve written
I’ve sat outside in the sun
why?
why do I wake up every day felling hollow
why doesn’t my medication make me want to stop hurting myself
why can’t I feel safe around myself
my family tells me I ruin everything
that I don’t know anything
I’m lazy
I dress wrong
I act wrong
my friends never reach out to me first not even my boyfriend, they do care about me but they don’t love me as much as I love them and that facts hurts, every time I open my mouth I think they are screeming at me to stop that they would rather have there eyes poked out than to listen to me talk, its not logcal I tell myself, but its so tiring figuring out what is logical every day I’m tired.
I would move heaven and earth for so many people and would one of them do the same for me?
I am a weirdo and thats okay I’m okay with that but I’m not okay with people treating me bad because of that which they do and it’s not fair I hate being treated like a silly girl who doesn’t know anything.
I think there is something fundementally wrong with me I am broken and cannot be fixed
​
​
when?
when does it get better?